I boarded my flight from Singapore to Nepal on the 29th of September, 2014, with no idea of what I would find at its conclusion. Living in Australia my whole life, and having come straight from Singapore with no previous experiences of third world countries, first world living standards, behaviours and environments were all that I knew of – until we landed in Kathmandu. My Grandma, Laurel Leak, and I were greeted with open arms by Ranju Pandey, who would accommodate us and take us with her to experience the culture of Nepal, as well as show us the progress of her and Laurel’s volunteer work at Aarati House. Standing outside the airport, I remember thinking how unreal it all was. I had never been surrounded by people who didn’t speak my language, let alone be amidst the hundreds of people yelling foreign words in an unfamiliar environment.
I had previously heard many people’s accounts of culture-shock, and was warned I was probably in for a surprise upon witnessing the urban environment and living standards of local Nepalese people. I waited for this shock to start hitting me during this drive. Surprisingly I never really felt it, even though the ride to Ranju’s home was nothing short of terrifying. I had never experienced such disorganised traffic, especially in the back of a tiny, broken Suzuki with a ‘Taxi’ sticker on the windshield. My first glimpse of a third world country was full of tangled electrical and phone wires, chaotic traffic, appalling roads and pollution everywhere. Mounds of bricks and rubbish lined the roads, and it didn’t occur to Laurel or me until near the end of our two week trip that we hadn’t seen a single rubbish bin. Over the course of our visit, Ranju graciously took us to many of the more famous temples, which were alive with colour, music and festivities, as our visit crossed over with the Hindu festival of Dashain. I was struck by the people’s dedication to their religion. Every morning and evening we could hear the sound of bells ringing throughout the area as people worshipped their respective gods in their worship rooms. Six days of our stay in Nepal were marked as public holidays and temples were packed with locals and tourists, as well as beggars and retailers. It was during this festival that I experienced the most confronting moments of my life so far. During the festival, it is common-place to see slain goats and buffalo everywhere. It is during Dashain that these animals are sacrificed, and I had already seen numerous headless goats and rivers of blood running through temples. We were taken to a particular area of the (Hindu) Shree Pashupatinath temple as daylight faded away. A river parted two sections of the temple. On the opposing side to us, steep stone steps rose up from the river to a clearing where very loud, joyous worshipping was taking place. The ceremony varied from loud music to sombre, deep humming as monks waved candles and fire in significant movements. Ranju, Laurel and I stood on a long, wide pathway that stretched the length of the river through the temple, elevated not quite as high from the river, with the same stone steps leading down as the other side.
Ranju explained that this was the side where the recently deceased are taken through a ritual and are then publically cremated. Sure enough, over the course of the evening, several dead bodies were taken to the temple to be prepared for the ritual. Having never been in the presence of death before, observing 4 dead bodies and 3 burning ones was quite confronting. What amazed me though is how the people are not afraid of death. As these bodies began arriving, people were crying out of sorrow and despair, the ceremony opposite was unaffected, the dancing and singing as energetic as ever. The way that over 50 people stood at the side of the river conversing with two bodies at their feet, apparently unfazed and not at all frightened, intrigued me. I assume it is their religion that has taught them not to be afraid of death. It is not at all feared or hidden as it is in my society. One of the major reasons for staying in Nepal was to visit Aarati House. It was explained to me how the organisation Setu Nepal works in conjunction with Aarati House in empowering and supporting women. Upon visiting the house, I met three beautiful girls who were staying full time at the house – Laxmi, Bipina and Binita. To anyone they may look like three healthy, happy, young girls, however after learning their backstories, I knew that their physical and mental states could not have been so positive without the help of Aarati House. After a few visits to the house, I also had the pleasure of meeting a few other children and their parents. On my first visit, I met a woman who had a very young daughter and was awaiting the daughter’s HIV test results, being HIV+ herself. During our visit, this mother received a phone call. Her daughter’s HIV results had arrived – she was HIV-. This woman burst into tears, the relief overwhelming her. The women in the house at the time consoled her, hugged her and embraced her. Although it was all in Nepalese, I could understand through actions and tones what was meant. The support and joy spread through the house like a warm breeze. It was over time that I learned of the disadvantages of a person positive for HIV. HIV/AIDS is not the only concern these people face as I had previously thought. HIV is highly contagious, often brought into a family from India via a husband’s business trip and accompanied affair with an HIV+ prostitute. HIV+ children are excluded from society, through no fault of their own, and it is very hard to find schools that will admit an HIV+ child. The support and donations from others, accompanied by Ranju’s incredible dedication and generosity, makes such a noticeable and positive difference in the lives of these children and mothers. The delight on these children’s faces when you show them the creation possibilities using pipe cleaners is heart-warming, and to witness the difference of giving a simple gift, first hand, is incredible. I only knew Laxmi, Bipina and Binita for a few days, but it was enough for me to leave Aarati House hoping like crazy that these girls will grow to be strong and independent, live long and happy lives and overcome the poverty and exclusion that they live in. During our stay in Nepal, Ranju, Laurel and I flew to visit a women’s prison. The women inside are supported by Ranju in varying ways of which I was not privy to. I was exposed to the first functioning prison I had ever seen, and am appalled at the living conditions and lack of support for the women and children inside. I learned of many pasts, crimes and reasons some of the ladies were in the prison. Many were for drug smuggling, which I learnt was a common cause and often a woman’s last resort to acquire some money. I met a woman who had murdered her husband’s second wife, or ‘co-wife’ as she is called. I also met a woman who claimed to be completely innocent of a murder her husband had in fact committed, and since he had fled the area, the police were left with no-one to blame except the wife. Many children accompany the women in prison because they have nowhere else to go. Both women and children are provided with a meagre amount of rice a week, and an even smaller amount of money, with which they must use to buy all of their living requirements – down to beds and other foods and spices to make meals of the rice. We were shown a room with a roof that was lower than my height of 170cms and about the average size of an Australian’s sitting room. However this was no sitting room. It was where seven women slept, some on single stone beds, others sharing double stone beds. The beds are also used by any children whose mother slept in that room.
There were several other sleeping rooms like this one, some of which had a small corner where meals were made with nothing other than a small burner. The way the women’s faces lit up when Ranju arrived and when we presented them with toys and gifts was incredible. The hope that Ranju provides them is incredible, and the joy that a grown woman has for two pipe cleaners really puts it into perspective what diminutive luxuries they have. Although the culture-shock never hit during this amazing, eye-opening experience, it certainly drove home to me the liberties, freedoms, choices, safety and lawfulness in which I live my everyday life. On my trip I was able to experience and witness such a vast variety of cultural areas, practices, monuments and rituals, as well as observe the difficulties and extreme challenges that Nepalese people face – challenges I could never fully appreciate until seeing it with my own eyes. I am beyond grateful to Laurel for inviting me to visit this incredible and diverse country. I am also immeasurably appreciative for Ranju’s generosity and hospitality towards us, as well as many others. It was a fascinating insight to see the huge difference effective support makes to others’ lives, as well as the tremendous effort that is required to provide that support.
